When I lived in Kansas City, I had a 37 mile commute to work. Now, I have a 37 step commute, and that's only if I stop for a cup of coffee on the way to the office. I absolutely love the fact that I can go to work in my pajamas. I usually remember to brush my teeth but I very rarely have to put a bra on. I am living the dream......except that sometimes....I hate that I work from home.
I am a people person by every definition of the word. I love people. Okay....I love "most" people. I need people. I even lean towards people pleasing.... but God is working on that one. :) People feed my soul. God designed me to be in fellowship with many different types of people.
One of the things that frustrated me the most at my last job was that the boss frowned upon any type of behavior that might result in camaraderie or relationship building. I caught the side eye a time or two for talking to my co-workers, even if I was consoling a friend who had just lost their dog. In one meeting, she told us that she was going on a business trip and while she was gone, she wanted us Managers to stay in our offices and not talk to each other. I still made a few good friends who I get the chance to talk to from time to time. It was a crazy work environment for someone like me.
So now...I work from home. Alone....in my home office. I have two dogs but they don't talk back to me. Don't get me wrong, I work with an incredible group of people. There isn't a day that goes by that I am not on the phone with one of them or sending instant messages back and forth. They encourage me to do the things God is calling me to do. They remind me to breathe when they know that I am feeling a little overwhelmed. They pray for me on a regular basis. They have become family to me.
No matter how awesome my new work family is, there is something missing. What is missing is the ability to get up and walk down the hall to say hello to someone else. At my job back in Kansas City, there were several places that one could find me if I wasn't in my office The Customer Service Department had a chair in the back of one of the rows that was affectionately called the "Jesus" chair. There were times when I would just need to escape and sit in that chair, among friends, and pray. I was also known to go into any number of offices and shut the door. The conversations that I had in those offices, you know who you are, sustained me through a very difficult season. I have a sneaking suspicion that those office conversations were a blessing to those folks as well.
We are designed to live and work in community. I think that has been the hardest struggle with living in Florida. You can have quick access to the beach and the most amazing winters, but they mean very little without friends to share them with. I knew there was a void but I didn't realize how HUGE it was until I spent almost 6 weeks back in Kansas City between Christmas and helping my Mom with her move. I was able to go to church services, bible studies, family fun nights, birthday parties, dinner with friends, small group nights, and sit on the couch with friends nights. Oh, how I soaked up every minute of it. It was so incredibly hard to leave all of them to go back to home. Don't get my wrong, I couldn't wait to get back to Leanna, and my own bed, and a normal routine but I knew I was going to miss "community".
As I mentioned last week, Florida is the stone that God has asked me to push. He has us here for now and we don't know how long it will be before He releases us to go home. Until then, I'm learning that I have to do something about finding "community" down here. Working from home is awesome but I need to find reasons to get out of the house around other people. I am reaching out to friends to see about having lunch. We are researching some new churches in the area that we can try. I have been looking for some volunteer opportunities where I might be able to get plugged in with some like minded people in our area. I am open to other suggestions if any of you have some good ideas.
I spent the first 39 years of my life in Kansas City. I have friends from as far back as middle school that I still talk to. I have carry over friends from different places I've worked over the years. I have an awesome group of people from church that still pour into my life. I am truly blessed in the friendship category and not just surface friends. I truly have an incredible tribe of people who speak life to me. When I was thinking about needing to come back home and start to build community here, my first thought was "It will take years to build those types of relationships in Florida." Then God whispered to my spirit, "It will take even longer if you don't get started now."
I am starting to recognize that this sense of community isn't just about meeting my needs either. God is reminding me that He has given me the gift of encouragement. He is reminding me that as much as I need other people, there are other people who need me. They need my willingness to be vulnerable with the life God has allowed me to walk. They need me to give them the gift of "me too". He is showing me that my time here is wasted if I am not out loving on those around me.
So...I can continue to lament about the loneliness I feel here. I can long to go back to Kansas City where my people are....or I can get busy changing my circumstances down here. I can go out into the world around and find some people to love. I can start now. It's really my choice. I choose to find a way to make it happen..and if it doesn't come easy.....that's okay. I'm kinda known for not giving up.
