One Cup of Water at a Time

The company that I work for has been struggling financially for a bit of time.  Most of the issues stem from a poor life partner decision by one of the owners that ended up costing the company quite a bit of money.

I believe that this current season is the reason God asked me to take a 70K a year pay cut and come work for this company.  It might also have been to teach me a thing or two about pride, humility, and identity.  God is taking all of the skills that I have learned in my leadership positions over the past 16 years and putting them to good use.  The CEO has empowered me to do what I can to keep the company's head above water until our new software is ready to launch.  I will tell you that it has been a struggle.

I handle all of the finances which means that I decide who is going to get paid and who isn't.  This includes not only our vendors, but our staff as well.  Almost everyone who works for the company are independent contractors so they submit a bill and we have a period of time to pay them.  When I first started working there, we would submit bills on Sunday and we would be paid on Monday.  The time between the billing and the paying kept getting farther and farther apart.  The staff was hurting.

Every day, I would field messages asking when I think this person or that person  might be paid.  I would hear heart wrenching stories about how rent was do in two days, or the lights were going to be shut off tomorrow.  I would look at our accounts, feeling helpless.  I would explain our current situation and then tell me when I thought I would be able to pay them.  I knew that God hadn't given me that weight to carry, but it was weighing on me just the same.

One day, I was driving back from picking Peanut up,  and I was listening to Nichole Nordeman's new album "Every Mile Mattered".  As I was driving, the song Hush, Hush came over the speakers.  It has a very different melody, almost haunting.  So much so that you almost miss the importance of the lyrics....almost.  Sometimes God will just smack you upside the head with some lyrics.

The song was inspired by a book called "How to Survive a Shipwreck" by Jonathan Martin.  It is from the perspective of God talking to someone who has been shipwrecked on an island.

But I love you if they never come

I love you in the scorching sun

One cup of water at a time

'Til you remember you are mine

And I will love you back together

These lyrics jumped right out of the song at me.  I started the song over to listen to them in context.  As I listened to them the second time, I heard God say to me, "One cup of water at a time, Holly.  That is how I am going to provide for the needs of your company.  You don't need to keep worrying and striving.  Lay the needs, as they come, at my feet and I'll provide it.  I need this company to learn to rely on me.  I need them to remember that they are mine."

It was a weight lifted off of my shoulders with that gentle reminder that He is in complete control of the situation that we are facing.  It isn't my job to save the company.  It is His job.  My job is to use the gifts and talents that He has equipped me with to the best of my ability.  He needs to do the rest.

I thought that was the end of the lesson but as I started the song over for the third time, I heard these lyrics:

And I am the storm that swallowed you

I let you bleed, I thought you knew

And I am the bottom, and I am floor

I am the deep you never knew before

I let you sink

And I let you go

But I caught you in the undertow

God made it very clear that He was the reason for the current state of the company.  He had allowed us to get to this very desperate place so that we would have no choice but to rely on Him.  He has used this season to teach us a lot about our priorities.  We have shaped a clearer vision for our future.  We have learned to be better stewards with the money He provides to us.  It has been a hard season, but it hasn't been for nothing.

I shared this "one cup of water" lesson with the team at work.  It is awesome to work for a company where it doesn't seem out of place to share what God is laying on my heart. Once I had shared what I felt God had showed me, He got busy showing off.  Every time someone comes to me with a need and wants to know when they will be paid, I explain that we don't have it but we will pray for the one cup of water to meet their needs.  Time and time again, God meets those needs and in doing so, increases the faith of all of us. 

I don't know what you are going through at the moment.  I don't know if you are walking out a tough season.  I don't know if God wrecked your ship or if someone else did.  What I do know is that God is faithful.  The one cup of water He provides doesn't always look like enough to me.  It may not look like enough to you.  But I promise you, He sees you.  He's got you. 

And I am the shore

And I am the flame

And mercy is My name

Hush, hush

Hush now