Anna LeBaron and The Polygamist's Daughter

Leanna and I have arrived in Dallas. It takes something big for us to use our budgetary dollars to travel some place other than  home to see the kids, a trip to a lighthouse, or a beach somewhere.  So why Dallas?  We are off to celebrate my friend Anna's book launch.  Anna's book, The Polygamist's Daughter officially releases on March 21st but we are having a party to celebrate on Saturday night.

I could write a huge blog post about why you should purchase The Polygamist's Daughter.  I could tell about how reading Anna's words was both gut-wrenching and healing for me.  I could write about how Anna faced things that other people couldn't even imagine and lived to tell about it.  I could write about how God captured Anna's heart and how He has redeemed all that she has been through.  I could write about the long journey of healing that Anna has begun to walk.  I could write about all of those things, but I would much prefer to just write about Anna.

How did I come to care enough about Anna to spend my hard earned money to fly out and celebrate her success?  It all started with a blog post that she wrote.  I am not sure how I stumbled across it.  Perhaps a friend of a friend had commented on it or maybe God knew that I needed to see it so He worked it out for it to appear in my FB feed.  You should read the blog post before continuing to read the rest of my post.  You can read it by clicking here.

Anna's blog post intrigued me for several reasons.  First of all, God is the master of coincidence.  It could only be God that orchestrated all of the things that caused Ruth and Anna to connect. I mean, can you imagine?? Second, I loved Anna's heart and her willingness to be obedient to what God was calling her to do.  She was willing to champion other first time authors even when she was likely frustrated with the "waiting" that she was experiencing with her own book.

I was so intrigued that I ended up joining #the4500launches and then joined the launch team for The Sound of Gravel.  What many don't know is that at about the same time, God had been rekindling a fire that He had put in my heart several years ago.  I will go into more detail about that in another blog post but it had to do with me writing my blog on a more consistent basis, writing a book about how God really can bring beauty from ashes, and for me to start sharing some of my story with groups of women.  I want to do those things, but also, I've been a bit scared.  When God lit that fire in me again, I remember explaining to God about how I don't have those types of connections in the world.  I don't know anything about writing a book, or blogging, or being a public speaker.  God very gently said, "Just do what I've asked of you Holly, I am already working on your behalf.  I will make all of the connections you need.  You just need to be obedient."

I could pretend that I've done all of the things that God has asked me to do, but the truth is, I haven't.  I had let fear get in the way of obedience.  Fear that the words I would write in  my blog post would come across wrong.  Fear that I wouldn't be able to honor my family in the way that I write my book.  Fear that I would have nothing to share from the stage.  God has been working with me to learn how to trust Him.  One of the ways He has helped me with my fears is to allow me the privilege of watching Anna walk out her dreams.

Anna's book was so beautifully written.  While it tells some hard truths about things that Anna experienced in her past, there was never a time where she dishonored her family.  After she finished her book, she went to visit her Mom and read it to her.  That couldn't have been easy, but Anna did it with such grace.  She has been travelling around sharing her story and participating in interviews about her book.  She isn't just promoting her book, she is willingly sharing the hard things in hopes that others can see that healing and redemption are possible.  She has been so brave with the telling of her story.

If you met Anna and didn't know her story, you would never guess that she came from anything but a loving, nurturing family.  I watch Anna in the #the4500launches group and she is always pouring God's love out on people.  She handles each person with such care and such concern.  I had told her that in honor of the three year anniversary of her starting the writing of her book, I was going to start mine.  She could've just given it a like and gone on her way, but she took the time to let me know that I could just put a working title together, write at least three sentences, and then I could officially say that I had started writing my book.  That was so encouraging, so that's exactly what I did.

Being a part of the #the4500launches has been a huge blessing to me.  I have been a part of numerous book launches and have been given a sneak peek at the process of promoting books.  A group of us bloggers have spun off our own group called #the4500blogs where we promote each other and hold each other accountable.  I am building friendships, learning things about how to be a better writer, and stretching outside my comfort zone.

When Anna invited the launch team down to Dallas for her book launch celebration, I took some time to pray about whether we should go or not.  It was during that time that God gently reminded me about how He has been working on helping me make connections to carry out the things that He has called me to do.  He clearly showed me that Anna was a key connection, not because of doors she could open but because of the example she has set out for those following behind her.   He also revealed to me that just like Anna, my focus needs to be on promoting, encouraging, and uplifting other people while I patiently wait my turn.  As I wait, He is healing up things in my heart and in my life that aren't in line with His plans for my future.

Anna, I pray that your book reaches all the way to the ends of the earth and that everyone will get a chance to read/hear your story.  I pray that it touches wounded hearts, in the same way that it has touched mine.  I pray that it spurs others on to a place of healing.  Getting to know you and reading your book has changed me, for the better.  I am keeping an eye out for those people that cross my path who need an "Estella" to advocate for them.  I am looking for people that I can be a "Diane" to and encourage them to find the healing they need.  Most importantly, I am no longer afraid of what God has in store for me.  Your courage has inspired me to be brave.  Thank you Anna, for allowing God to do amazing things through you and your story.  I am so excited for you!!  Congratulations.

If you want to know more about Anna's story, she has done several interviews. I will link some of them below.  Please, please, please buy this book or encourage your local library to buy it for you.

The Shaun Tabatt Show

Stories of Unfolding Grace

41 Strong Podcast

What It Means To Be Beautiful

I am currently working through a Beth Moore Bible Study called Breaking Free.  Last week's homework was about the childhood girlish dreams that we had.  She mentioned several things that weren't actually childhood dreams of mine, like being a bride or having children.  She also talked about how girls dream about being beautiful.

I have thought a lot about the term beautiful over the last few months.  I see so many posts on Facebook that talk about women who desire to be beautiful.  They talk about how they need to get new clothes, or try this new makeup, or how they need to lose weight.  Even Beth Moore in her study talks about how women are naturally insecure about how they look.

I have never fit the mold of what society considers to be a beautiful girl.  I don't wear makeup.   I rarely put on fancy clothes, and by fancy I mean slacks and a nice shirt.  I don't have the ability or desire to accessorize.  I have a few extra pounds around the waist. I don't own a blow dryer or a curling iron, nor do I want to, and I truly believe that a pony-tail is a hair style.  There are many people in the world who would look at me and beautiful would be the farthest thing from their thoughts.  When I stand in front of the mirror, I don't see pretty reflected back at me but I do see beautiful.

Do you know what I see when I look in the mirror that helps me to understand how beautiful I am? I see gray hair.  This means that I have lived a good number of years, even when I didn't want to sometimes.  I see blue eyes that have seen things more horrific than anyone should ever have to see and yet I've survived.  I see wrinkles and laugh lines from years of sending smiles out into the world, hoping to get a smile in return. I often see someone who looks like she has just gone through a battle, because often I have.  It just means that I am not afraid to keep on fighting for chains to be broken in me and in the lives of others.

I hope when people look my way, they also see those traits in me.  I hope when they look at me, they see the light and love of Jesus shining out of me.  I hope they see the beauty of a person who is not without fault, but constantly fighting to send love out into the world.  I know that this is the beauty that I look for, and often see in others.  Physical appearance is a mere shadow to the beauty that radiates out of a person.

I think Glennon Doyle Melton said it best when she described beauty in her book, The Love Warrior. She was explaining the concept of beautiful to her daughters.

"You two will meet plenty of people who are pretty but haven't yet learned how to be beautiful.  They will have the right look for the times, but they will not glow.  Beautiful women glow.  When you are with a beautiful woman you might not notice her hair or skin or body or clothes, because you'll be distracted by the way she makes you feel.  She will be so full of beauty that you will feel some of it overflow onto you.  You'll feel warm and safe and curious around her. Her eyes will twinkle a little and she'll look at you really closely- because beautiful, wise women know that the quickest way to fill up with beauty is to soak in another human being.  Other people are beauty, beauty, beauty.  The most beautiful women take their time with other people.  They are filling up.

Women who are concerned with being pretty think about what they look like, but women who are concerned with being beautiful think about what they are looking at.  They are taking it all in.  They are taking in the whole beautiful world and making all that beauty theirs to give away to others."

I remember when I first read this, I thought "Yes....this....this is the kind of beautiful that I long to be."  God has truly blessed  me by surrounding me with truly beautiful people.  They come in all shapes, sizes, and appearances but they are so beautiful.  Take a look at those around you, who are the most beautiful people that you know?  Who are the people that take their time with you?  Who are the ones that take in everything around them and look for ways to overflow their beauty onto the situation? Have you told them lately that you think they are beautiful?  Perhaps you should.