He Works Differently in All of Us

In a book I've been reading, the author recalls the experience of the first bible study that he ever attended.  Both of his parents were gay and his only exposure to Christians were those on the street corner condemning his family.  He decided that he was going to start going to church so he could learn about Christians in order to have more knowledge to fight against them.  Along the way, God captured his heart.

He was invited to his first bible study by someone at the church.  He recalls how "green" he was.  The leader asked them to open their bibles to 1 Corinthians and some how he managed to land on 1 Chronicles.  As the leader started reading, the author quickly realized that he was in the wrong place. Then the leader asked each member to take a verse and read it aloud.  He was scared to admit that he thought he had the wrong version of bible or something.  When he finally admitted that something was wrong, some in the group tried to be helpful, while others were frustrated and/or made fun of him.  The point of him sharing the story in the book was that we as Christians need to remember that not everyone is on the same page or at the same place in their walk.  

It reminded me of a Vacation Bible School (VBS) that I was sent to when I was younger.  I was probably eleven or twelve.  I just remember being in the oldest VBS class.  At first, I thought it was some kind of punishment for something I had done wrong.  I didn't know why I had to go be "watched over" when I could've been at home watching old Leave It To Beaver re-runs on tv.  It really turned out to be pretty fun though.  I especially liked snack time and playing softball.  There was a moment though that has stuck with me over the years.  Considering that I hit the fourth floor in age last year, that's a lot of years.

 The VBS wasn't all fun and games, there was one part of the rotation where they talked to us about the bible.  The leader of that group started out by asking us to introduce ourselves.  She wanted us to state our names and tell her when we were saved.  To this day, I can almost feel the overwhelming panic that started to rise up in me.  I didn't really know what being saved meant.  She started at the front of the room.  Lucky for me I always hung out in the back.  I was hoping that I would figure out what being saved meant before she got to me.  One by one, each kid stated their name and then said what month and year they were saved.  Slowly, the teacher crept ever closer to me.  By then, I switched my thinking from trying to figure out what being saved meant to trying to figure out what lie would make the most sense.  I wasn't about to be the outsider who either admitted that she didn't know what being saved meant or who hadn't been saved at all.  I started trying to find a month and year somewhere close, but different, to what others were saying. When I got to me, I stated my name and rattled off my saving date.  I was so utterly relieved when she went on to the next person and didn't call me out on the lie.  

As I mentioned, that incident stuck with me for years.  I was "saved" in 1998.  As I began to get more involved in ministry at my church, I always tried to remember that moment.  I tried to be aware of people who were not only new to our specific church but new to this whole way of life.  I also tried to remember that experience at VBS,  when someone was struggling in a particular area of their life.  My pastor was famous for saying that God works out salvation in each of us in different ways.  We can never expect that the path God is using in our life to draw us closer to Him is the same path He is using for everyone.  I used to be a smoker. I remember a co-worker asking me how I could stand on the smoke dock at work and talk about Jesus.  I knew that my body was a temple and that smoking was not good for me but God knew that there were more pressing issues in my spirit that needed to be dealt with first.   God will never pull us along the path He has for us, faster than our ability to follow Him.

May we be those who remember that we are all in different places in our walk and may we have grace for each other.

When You Shouldn't Listen

I was mentioning in yesterday's post about how God has used different people to speak truth into my life.  I was contemplating yesterday morning about how God has me in a season of Winter.  Then I thought about my dear friend who gave me that word straight from the Lord.  Of course, then I started thinking about times God has had someone speak right to where I was standing.  

As I was pondering these handful of people that God has used, I thought about HOW I knew that what they were telling me was from God.  I caution folks all the time to be careful about who they are listening to.  I can't begin to count how many times someone has come up to me and said, "The Lord told me to tell you that you should  (fill in the blank)."  My immediate gut reaction to those people is, "No He didn't."  Maybe I am wrong, but I don't believe God will ever use someone else to tell me which choice to make or how to think or what to believe.  I think God uses people in my life to confirm something that He has already been telling me or to point me in a direction of prayer.  

​One example of this I've discussed in a previous blog post.  God had been working in my heart to find a place of forgiveness for my Dad.  I didn't want to.  I mean...I REALLY didn't want to.  Completely out of the blue, God sent someone who I wasn't really close to, but I knew to be faithful in prayer, to tell me that God wanted to heal my Daddy issues, I just had to ask Him to.  This sweet friend met the criteria that I use to determine if the messenger is really delivering a message from God.  How many of you know that the devil will use people too??  This friend confirmed something that God had already put on my heart.  She also didn't approach me with a message telling me WHAT to do.  Had she walked up and said to me, "God told me to tell you that you need to drive to your Dad's house and tell him that you forgive him", I wouldn't have listened to her.  She would've been confirming something God put on my heart, but she would have been taking the place of God.  In the New Living Translation of Isaiah 30:21 it says "Your own ears will hear Him.  Right behind you a voice will say, "This is the way you should go" whether to right or to the left."  God and only God will direct my steps.

The other example is the one that I opened with where God used my friend to give me the word Winter.  I had reached out to the tribe that I wrote about yesterday.  Those trusted prayer warriors who pray for me regularly.  I sent out a message letting them know that we had been advised my company that we would be closing and that we would all be losing our jobs.  I asked them to pray for a number of things.  A few days later, this friend sent me a message and said that the word she was getting from the Lord was Winter.  She made it clear that she didn't really know how God was going to reveal that word to me, she just encouraged me to get into the Word and meditate on Winter.  To look at how nature handles Winter.  Basically, she said, the Lord gave me this word for you, now go get with Him so HE can tell you what it means.  She didn't tell me that it should mean this or that.  

I guess I just want all of us to be careful about who or what we are listening to.  Here is just a small list of the things I have heard:

• God told me to tell you that you should just leave your husband.
• God told me to tell you that if you aren't happy at your job, you should quit.
• God told me to tell you that if you don't quit living that way, you are going to Hell.

We need to be able to measure that nonsense up against the truth and say, "No, He didn't."  Don't get me wrong, I think some of these folks mean well.  They may have even heard from the Lord on your behalf but maybe...just maybe..they were trying to finish His sentence.  If you are praying for someone else and God gives you the word Winter for them, don't you go trying to figure out what He means by it and if someone else is praying for you, don't let THEM interpret HIS message.

Who Is Praying For You?

I was thinking today about all of the times in my life that God has used other people to speak His truth to me.  I was thinking about dear friends who have come to me in specific seasons of my life with a word from the Lord.  These are people who I know to be fervent prayer warriors.  Friends who know the power of intercessory prayer.   For those who don't know what intercessory prayer is, it is basically just a big Christian word meaning "to pray to God for someone else".  

 I have a tribe of people that I pray for every day.  I pray to God for them. Often times I know specific needs but sometimes I don't.  I pray for their families and their jobs and their sense of self worth.  I just pray for them.  I also know that I have a tribe of people who are praying those same things for me.  He has used those prayer warriors in my life more than I could've ever imagined.

How many of you know that God sometimes answers prayer through other people?  I do.  Sometimes we are struggling to hear from God.    We need to know that this storm will pass. We need to know that we matter.  That we are making our lives count for something.  We need to hear something.  We need answers!!

Sometimes God won't answer me directly.  He will send someone whom I trust to speak His answers.  I've often wondered why He does that.  I am constantly seeking His will. Okay...sometimes I just want to do it my way....so I am "most of the time" seeking His will.  I am open to hearing from Him.  I have learned the sound of His voice in my heart.  So why use other people?  Perhaps it is because He knows that we need to work on building those trusting relationships with each other.  Maybe He knows that we aren't meant to walk this journey alone.

 I think He wants me to learn to trust others with my hard stuff, my secret stuff, the stuff that I worry about, the stuff that I dream about.  He wants me to have friends to lean on when all I want to do is run away and isolate.  He knows the importance of having a tribe of friends who will hunt me down when I've "gone quiet" for too long.  We aren't meant to go through this life alone.  Do you have a tribe of people that you know you can rely on?  It could be a tribe of 2, it doesn't have to be some HUGE group.  Do you have someone in your life that you know is praying for you daily?  If not, send me a message, I'll be happy to pray for you.

Funny thing- This post started out with a completely different message in my head.  It was supposed to be about knowing when to listen to others but I guess God wanted to make sure you knew you needed others before I told you when to listen to them.

More Than I Could Think To Pray For

Phillipians 4:6  says "​Don't worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God"

My church back in Kansas City has a Facebook page where all of the women of the church can remain in fellowship with each other throughout the week.  They share about upcoming events, they celebrate achievements, but most often the group is used for prayer requests.  These beautiful women walk through some really hard stuff and they know that their truths can be shared amongst the group and their needs will be lifted up.  I count it a joy to be able to pray with and for my sisters.  I am learning something though.  I am learning that my prayers often are not big enough.  

I think I've always known this in the back of my head but two recent occasions come to mind.  Last year, a lady from the church we were attending let me know that her sister was having surgery for ovarian cancer and  asked that I would pray for her upcoming surgery.  I prayed fervently that the tumor would be contained inside of the ovary and that it wouldn't have spread anywhere.  I prayed and I prayed.  On the day of surgery, we received the best possible news.  The mass that they had found on the CT scan,that they were convinced was cancer, was benign.  I rejoiced with my friend and even remember saying how cool it was that God gave us more than we could have even thought to ask for.  

Fast forward to my surgery last week.  I was so nervous about having this surgery as I know so many people who have had back surgery and regretted it.  I prayed for a successful surgery.  That my body wouldn't reject the rods, plates, and screws that they were putting in.  I prayed that they wouldn't have a need to fuse more than one section.  I prayed that they wouldn't perforate my bowels on accident.  I prayed against every bad thing that could possibly happen during surgery and just asked that the surgery be successful.  

There are no words for the smile that came across my face in the recovery room when I was told that not one single piece of hardware was needed during my surgery.  The surgeon opened me up and found three pieces of bone that were broken and needed to be removed and when he checked the stability of the two vertebrae, he discovered that God had already done the hard part.  The two vertebrae that were going to need to be bolted together were completely fused together.  Solid as a rock.  All on their own.  Praise Jesus!!!!  

Are you kidding me??  Already fused???  I'm sure someone could try to give me some scientific explanation of how or why those two vertebrae were already fused but I am choosing to believe that God simply took care of it. He took care of me.  It would've never occurred to me in a million years to ask Him to fuse my spine up so that my surgeon wouldn't need any hardware.  

I've had a lot of down time in past week as I can't really do much while I'm healing.  I've spent a lot of time thinking about some of the mountains that I and some of my friends need to climb in the months ahead.  What if we thought about the best case scenario in some of these situations?  What if we dared believe that God would answer our needs in ways we couldn't possibly imagine?  What if we really believed that God has a purpose and a plan for all of the storms and we simply trusted that He will give us His best?  I'm challenging myself to change my thinking.  Want to join me?

Two Lists

Many of you who read my blog have been following along with our lives via Facebook.  I will spare all of the details that have been the constant turmoil that our lives have been in since we made the decision to move down here.  We often get caught up in all of the negative.  It has been A LOT!!!  Really, we have earned the right to look over the past, especially the past year, and hang our head in defeat.  We have suffered significant loss, significant parenting stresses, significant health issues, and significant financial hardships.  We were driving to meet a friend for lunch a few weekends ago and we were discussing all of the things that we have come up against.  The more we talked, the more we couldn't get past the all consuming heaviness of what we have been walking through.  That's was when we had a fantastic idea.  On the long drive home from lunch, we decided to make two lists.

One list was a comprehensive list of all of the incredibly painful/stressful/costly things that have happened to us since God asked us to move to Florida.  We captured everything we could think of.  Every single thing that broke in and around our house to include every flat tire, every pool pump, every septic pump, every damaged fender.  We captured every trip to the ER, imaging center, appointment with specialists, and every minute wasted sitting with a heating pad for us and for those we deeply love.  We captured every vet appointment, doggy surgery, and cancer diagnosis.   We captured every tough conversation with one of the kids.  We made an honest attempt to get it all on paper.

Then we did the best thing that we could've ever done.  We made a second list of all of the amazing things that have come since God asked us to move to Florida.  We counted numerous healed relationships where distance had allowed perspective.  We counted the fact that not one of the broken things had to go unfixed because we didn't have a way to pay for it.  We counted us being able to meet the Hatmakers and get involved in the work they are doing through the Legacy Collective.  We talked about how we are learning to stretch outside of our comfort zones and ask others for help.  We have learned to not  allow "busy" to control our lives.  We are learning that time in the hammock with a good book is just as important as an evening of bible study.  

I cannot begin to tell you what making those two lists did for us.  It took the focus off of every bad thing that has happened to us and put our eyes back on the blessings. The heaviness lifted and we found the strength to keep fighting.   It reminds me of a line in the song "Just Be Held" by Casting Crowns.  "If your eyes are on the storm, you'll wonder if I love you still, But if your eyes are on the cross, you know I always have and I always will."

If you are struggling with the weight of all that is coming at you, let me encourage you to take a minute to make two lists of your own.  The first list shows you in black and white that you aren't going crazy and  you have a right to feel a little frazzled.  The second list shows you that God is still working, even when you can't see Him.